Horrible horrible rant

This is stupid. I was writing soemthibg and i accidentally deleted it. I really do wish my life had ended before highschool!!!! And I can't even post it anonymously because I'm not 18. I ahev no dreams I have no goals I have mo aspirations, I have nothing!!!! I ahev no motivation, I stopped caring about school, ohh my god!!! And I do have friends, but I'd be lucky to be able to talk tot them more than twice a week!! I dojt even go out of the house. I've never went to the mall by myself, hell, I haven't even went outside by myself!!!!! All I am known for is being "quiet," "shy," and someone fucking wrote "obedient"??? I mean I guess it's true but why the fuck would you write that. And I can't even help yaht I'm like this!! I've tried changing, I really have, but I can't do itttttt I get so nervous before I speak and I juts quit the moment I get scared. And even when I do manage to talk to someone, my replies always come out dry and,, boring? Yeah whatever anyways. If you're reading this, since I cannot post anonymously, I am fine and well.