a member

Lately I've been trying to be more feminine. Caring about how I look, shaving my legs and body, letting my hair grow, softening my voice when I can. But I try not to let anyone notice, I make up excuses, or just act different with people I know for some reason. My parents wouldn't support me, at most I think my mother might understand, but my family too conservative and religious to accept it. I guess they haven't noticed, but keeping it from them makes it harder for me. I do as much as I can just to feel better with myself, but I think it's too little, and I'm too afraid to change something too suddenly because some people would notice, but at the same time I kind of want them to notice. I also feel insecure about my body. I look into the mirror and I'm not sure about my proportions, sometimes I feel I'm too tall, or my posture is bad, sometimes I feel ugly when I look at myself, but the next day I feel I look good. At the end I'm not sure by myself, and I don't usually receive any feedback from others... I just want to feel pretty.