a member

I love my her, but i don't consider her as my mother anymore. I still deeply care about her and will do anything for her and my sisters and I still address her as mother because it'll hurt her feelings if i call her otherwise but I don't know, years of being her firstborn, growing up with the complicated woman that she is made me empathize and criticized her as a parent and person but somewhere I distance myself from that feeling of being her child and of her being my mom, independent of my sisters, I'll still help and take care of her because no matter what she is a constant in my life. My feelings with him is effectively the same except it's weirder to call him dad, I don't think I care for a man that made himself exist in my life through my sisters being and such, I don't care for him as much as he believes I do or want to but I guess I don't want to break that illusion of his. I only care about my sisters and my step brothers and maybe step mother. I like my step mother because she is caring towards me at least more than my father is but her controlling nature does make me scared and hesitant for anything more because I already know what it's like to what on eggshells and almost ran away from home because of it.