a member

I feel heavy. Like very very heavy. We broke up, no closure, no goodbyes—just broke up. It hurts so fucking much... It really does. I don't know anymore, should I be relieved I finally gave him what he wanted? Or be sad because I lost him because of it. I'm trying my best to be optimistic about this, I really am, but I'm a human, I can't stop whatI feel. This is the first time I felt a pain so bad I feel it in my chest and stomach everytime. It is to the point where I think if this goes on, I'll go mad... Like crazy mad... I feel so pathetic and I don't know what else to do. I love too deep I forgot that some things will end. Maybe I got too comfortable that maybe he loves me too much he'll stay forever. Please someone help me make this stop.