If I'm not a man or woman then what am I???

I feel like I'm too feminine for my own good... I type with emoji's :T and use weird and wacky fonts to express myself! ᴸᶦᵏᵉ ᵗʰᶦˢ ᵐᵒᵗʰᵉʳᵈᵘᶜᵏᵉʳ• I'm VERY certain I'm not a trans woman or non-binary. That's when I reveal the tittle was clickbait??? I guess 😛 IT'S NOT THAT DEEP. I'm just feel emasculated by me being myself! Being cringe is part of being a little boy–teen AND I'M NEITHER!!! 😭 I'm a grown adult!... with neurodyversity. This is where it all boils back to- ugh I hate being this ,but also how tf can I hate it if without it I wouldn't be me??? –I HATE IT!!! –𝘠𝘰𝘶 𝘤𝘢𝘯'𝘵 𝘩𝘢𝘵𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧 𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳. –Watch me 👁👁 See!! Now I'm trolling myself!!! great. Anyways I know I'm a man (and maybe something else?) me thinks I'm genderfluid ,but I never actually tested that being male is just the default ,comfy spot. Err... Something something neurodivergents don't care about gender norms that's why they are able to break it easily and explore. There's a whole gender forest out there and I'm too poor to afford my exploration gear 😔I shall remain confused and ugly Not gonna lie xe/xim are fire pronouns ,THERES X IN IT!!! "I'M NOT LIKE OTHER BOYS!!!" Ahh, I'M MENTALLY ILL RAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHJJJJJ IM SUPPOSED TO BE ASLEEP RIGTH NOW WE BUT MY BRAIN IS A FIRING SQUAD OF THOUGHTS RIGHT NOWWWW >.<)ugh- someone give me sleeping durgs!!! PE∆CE OUT!