I feel traped

I feel traped. I dont know how i get here but ever since i was in 6 grade i feel traped, trapped in my head , traped in my toughts. There is no escape, i can't tell anyone cause no one listened my mom just Lectures me my friends they are the one who traped me in the first place but they are my classmate i see the good in them i have hope they will change but i dont know no one will listen i dont know what to do nobody is around there is 1 or 2 people that listen that understand but im scared to open up more. Scared of judgement, so i kept them at the surface of the pain that won't go away. But im now junior high School i dont really meet them. (I can only open up here this is the only safe place i have)