a member

If I were to love myself, it would be under the condition that I would strive to look prettier so I would be able to live with the fact that I failed myself. Yet for this friend of minr, I find myself loving them with such immense care like they were a version of me that never failed me. A version of me I an capable of caring for unconditionally. Their wellbeing is if they're my own. I am more than willing to dedicate myself into their comfort and happiness in any way I can. Whether I'd be so lucky as to be their partner or not, I only wish for their presence--though at certain times; I had wished they were dependent on me emotionally so I could tend to them as they continue to acknowledge me, even if they only do so in their vulnerable state. .. But one day, my mask cracked--and I shared my vulnerability as they would then disappear unexpectedly. Their silence drove me to despair, concern for their safety, concern for my failure to preserve the relationship from showing my vulnerability, and concern for their return. It's been a week now. I could only reminisce and hope for us to talk like we used to. I promise I'll hide my crack better next time.