a member

I am bicurious. I KNOW I am into BOTH men and women. I just haven't dated either of them yet. I really want to explore my attraction to women. I've grown up assuming I'm straight but as of this year I've started slowly accepting that yeah maybe that's not case. Now one thing about me is that men don't want me. They dont find me attractive or desirable. From my friend group I'm the DUF(Designated ugly friend). I've never received attention from my male peers and I often got bullied and made fun of by them. Hell sometimes they wouldn't even want to be associated with me. And ngl that's made me less eager to date men. I'm not saying I'm no longer into men, but that factor deters me from wanting be with them. I'm more rather open to dating women now, but I don't want to appear as one of those women who are like "men are trash, so I'm dating women 💅🏾" And in regards to women, I'm kind of scared bc like this is my first time 😭🙌, and another thing is it's hard to find wlw where I live 😔. Whats worse is that I'm into fem women and stems, rather than masculine women. It's genuinely hard to find a wlw femmes. Idk what do anymore.🥀 I've been yearning and lonely and I'm tired.😔🥀