Why I prefer to enjoy being alone

I hate when people look at me. I hate when people say things about me. I hate how they choose for me and I generally hate any kind of people around me. Family, friends or even just a stranger. I feel disgusted, but also disoriented about myself the more they talk shit. What a harsh start already, right? This might just be shit talk but yeah. I just wanna say that the moment you become who you are, who you want to be and fall in love with. Unlike the past whether that was different or just a little bit okay. Doesn't matter the fuck they should change You about anything. I'm slowly turning into a mix goth and I love it so much. The people around me won't like it Infact hate who I want to be. Then they go and make fun of it, saying that it's just a style and phase. seriously leave me alone. Why can't I just be alone already? I dream of this, I wish of this to come true one day. That I can finally explore my own self and find it. One day, another year. I'll be closer than ever. [END "Why, why, can't I just be alone? Am I afraid or just at ease once I am? What if I'm just being dramatic and this means nothing?" "No. I enjoy being alone not because of who or me. It is another coping mechanism of mine that I do, for me to relax. And not to have another mental breakout" "I love myself, and I won't let others define who I see myself as."