Im scared.

Im scared and I dont know whats next. Im almost a second year in college and ever since in elementary I never felt the passion others felt when they play a sport. I continued playing because its what my dad wanted, he said that it'll the only thing that will help me. I got into this university as a player, but I always skipped training. Its so hard and Im not close with the other players, I talk to them and all, but it still felt different and I feel left out when with them. Theyre awesome people and Im jealous that their good at something I couldnt be. I always wanted to quit, it was never what I wanted to be, but it brought satisfaction to my family that Im not just another kid whos always at home doing nothing or playing video game or just hanging out with people all the time doing things I shouldnt. I find everything so hard to. Im still dependent on my parent, I live with them in a small home along with my older sister, its normal in our country to still be living with family and all. Im not sure what I want to be and im scared that Im just dissapointing my dad and everyone around me. I never said a single soul about this, but I want to hear what the grown up thinks.