Funny

I lwky always call a "caramel macchiato" a "Chevrolet Silverado" because I think it's funny and sounds similar

I was at the McDonald's and my card declined for the mcchicken and ice water I wanted to get 😔

Encouraging the printer. Apologising to the vacuum after hitting the skirting board. Saying "come on" to a loading bar as though the loading bar has options. No notes. This is normal and i’ll hear…

I bought a fly trapper my mom bought it but still. I tooked the trapped flies then I took therye wings off apart and put them in A jar then put food in my favorite game was straw race first to get…

That every day I wish I committed that day. I regret being a coward and didn't fucking do it.

does anyone else remember when "👁👄👁" was a huge thing online ? just thinking back lol.

I'm 19 years old and sometimes i pee my bed in my dreams. Thats it, thats the post. No one knows it and will never know it.

I wonder what it would be like to meet a celebrity 🤔🤩 I think I wouldn't believe it's them 😳😭 I think I would believe they are a lookalike and my mind would think that celebrities only exist in…

Two stamps out of ten, from a café in a town I passed through, kept because throwing it away would waste the two stamps. The two stamps are worth nothing. I know this. The card is still in there.

A bowl of instant noodles, rendered with steam and a specific slurp, will beat an actual photograph of the same bowl every time. I think it’s because the drawing includes how it’s supposed to feel,…

Open it. Nothing. Close it. Wander off. Return ninety seconds later in case the situation has developed. It never has. I’ll do it again tonight.

Skydived. I would die of fright on the way down

You get one and a half sentences in, it vanishes, and you spend the next two hours not knowing you could have been blocking that entire time. Somebody wrote those. Somebody workshopped those. I hope…

It started as everyone’s first names. Then it was a joke from one specific night. Then it was a different joke that nobody outside the chat can be told about. It has not been changed in two years…

Sleep ✌️

I love going balls deep while she's asleep. To wake her ass up. So she can go fix me a sandwich.

Every verse is confident, fluent nonsense until the chorus arrives and I rejoin the actual song at full volume like I was there the whole time. The worst part is that I’ve been singing my version…

Mine was assuming a common expression meant roughly the opposite of what it means, and using it confidently, in front of people, for a very long time. Nobody corrected me. That’s the part that…

It leaves the actual typos completely alone and then rewrites the one word that changes the meaning of the entire message, in a note to someone important, at speed. Years of machine learning, all of…

Batteries of unknown charge. Four keys. A charger for something nobody owns. Instructions in six languages for an appliance that left the house years ago. Nobody put those there. They accumulated.…

Is it me or are anime reviews 1000x funnier when a black guy reviews them

A first kiss 🙄 I was at a movie with a friend and his brothers for his birthday. I couldn't hear the dialogue. I tapped my friend on the shoulder to ask if he could tell me what they were saying.…

I'll never make a non-momentary Huni post again, I didn't know there were so many weird plp in this app 😭😭 Be carefully out there guys :P

Ngl my joint kinda small, and I fear I might get cooked if I show it to the wrong person, I know I stull gotta put my self out there to find the one but still it feels extra hard(pause) but still I…

Funny videos make me laugh

Imagine being an artist in the lolcow community only to get your Discord hacked because you didn't try hard enough to protect yourself. That's fucking crazy, dog 💀💀 The biggest thing about being…

Yep

I have an unhealthy kind of skill. The one where I avoid any problems instead of dealing with it and trying to find a better way.

I can't take this anymore I'm young but so desperate for money. Like if some rich lady wants a servant I'm in. All you need to do is pay for my education and robux and I'm in.

My third grade friend who took my favorite doll I never got it back 😭😭😭🥲🫪

Can people cast their confessions into the tide please I want to reply to people

I managed to attend to my orientation at school.

A few weeks after the first day of school, I was told that I needed to attend a training meant for club officers. I got into the room, took a seat, and decided to mind my own business. Fast forward,…

Leon Scott Kennedy edits always on my mind 🤤 does anyone else love Leon? Or Jill Valentine? Or just any Resident Evil characters cause they all be hella fine 😼 Have a catboy Leon I drew as a…

I er uh. Beat the knight in deltarune. My life is very uneventful bro

Lowkey, making mud pies 🥧

Ever since I found this app on an ad on YT, it's been confusing ever since. I am so confused and also wary about the possible dangers of this platform that is very new to me. I need a bit of…

What are you doing genuinely it is the 2026🥹🙏🙏 if have harassed furries go do your fucking research you twat. Genuinely ur just the most miserable person and hate fun "b-but they th-think they're…

Acting drunk (mind you I was 11) with my friends (at church 😭) After drinking fucking coffee. Who the hell does that?! People were like walking by and giving as weird looks like wtf? Good ol'…

new here! HI EVERYONE!! 🐬

Skibidi Sigma pomni digital fornite chamba free gigachad rizz omg floo xxx tentacion hotmail Lionel Ronaldo junior mewing 3 chiki ibai Xocas ete sech toy Golden puppet Ohio Rubén tuesta YTpro insano…

Hallo Hallo Hallo Hallo Hallo Hallo Hallo Hallo Hallo Hallo Hallo Hallo Hallo Hallo Hallo Hallo hallo hallo hallo hallo hallo hallo hallo hallo hallo hallo hallo hallo hallo hallo hallo hallo hallo…

What if... Humans has Monkey Dna because an idiot Fucked a Monkey in the start of mankind

So there's this OLD anime called Ranma ½ (NOT the remade version—that one hurts my soul). I usually watch anime dubbed. Yes, I know, it's a super unpopular opinion. The original English voice actors…

Soo, others find this WEIRD but I'll say it tastes amazing. It's French Fries with Chocolate Milk. And i love it when both are from McDonald's. Don't judge me but it's amazing. I sometimes do it…

Alright so the story began when I was playing Minecraft and the new members of the server join, cuz I'm one of the senior members I should help them to look around. Around 1 AM when I goes to mine…

2 days before I decided to actually listen to mommy asmr for the first time instead of larping because I just wanted to laugh I ended up crying during it

why do i feel horny every time i hear an asmr.. mostly the cracking sounds

It's funny, really. And it's my first post here (so, hi!!) anyway, yeah. I live, laugh, love coffee. It makes my day better and it makes me happy. If I don't drink my coffee, I get cranky and have a…

This is so embarrassing and I needed to spill this out. So uhh I was sending pictures to our friend group chat, but I accidentally clicked on the class group chat, so I said wrong gc sorry, when I…